I rearranged my bedroom / office today. It gave time as I found items to reflect. I went through a huge personal growth week in the last couple of weeks that hugely impacted me and gave me an A-Ha lightening bolt shock to my thoughts.
You see for a while now I have been wondering what my “Why” is to why I am so passionate about Newborn Photography. During an excercise in trying to find my why it was presented with 3 questions and only one would be the “one”
That morning I read my life story I had written out and the question that affected me was What Life Altering Situation affected you so deeply. And BAM I immediately started weeping.
The tears are flowing now as I type this. I lost my second baby at 4.5 mths of pregnancy. It was a little boy and we named him Michael. I was only 22 at the time, so young, and still in my own opinion naive and innocent.
It was quite a traumatic experience that I still haven’t forgotten 24 years later. When I lost him I was afraid to look at him as I was scared that I would have nightmares for the rest of my life if I did. I won’t go into the details here.
All I know is if I could turn back time oh the things I would do. I would look at him, for heaven’s sake I would hold him and kiss his tiny face and hold his teeny fingers. I think in a way all these years I have been ashamed of myself that I hadn’t.
I feel I didn’t honor him as much as I could have.
I had two friends who gave me a little flower basket that I still have and it has come with me through 5 moves in Calgary and 7 moves In Steinbach and 8 moves in Saskatoon. It has been to 3 provinces and 20 moves. That is how precious this little keepsake memory is to me. Its ALL I have of him.
I am forever grateful to them for gifting me with it all those years ago. Thank you!!
We don’t know how much time we have with each other and a little fresh baby is so precious and deserves to be honored and captured in their dear and sweet innocence and with that moving forward each session will be done in honor of my precious little boy named Michael. He was born on my mom’s birthday and he was due on Christmas day.
Such significance and so many special days that keep him forever in my memory.
Know that when you are trusting me to capture your newborn that I am shooting your session with all my heart and I want it to be perfectly captured and give you beautiful keepsake pictures of your precious little one.